Taylor Lautner comes Out and Proud y'all...

Or... not... :( I'm subscribed to Unicorn Booty, a gay news blog that I find charming. They have the perfect amount of serious news, balanced with hysterical crap that you just couldn't make up... Today they post this,

 and I about had a heart attack... before I actually read the article, and realized it's a fake. BOO! But my question is this: Why am I so [excited/disappointed] at the idea that TayTay is [GayGay/No homo]? And I can name a few celebs that many people would like to see come out of the closet, gays and straights alike:
(by the way, I just typed into Google "actors that" and it finished for me "might be gay". OMGLOL...)

Zac Efron (my personal celeb crush [ask me about the dream I had about him])
Robert Pattinson
Tom Brady
Jake Gyllenhaal
George Clooney
John Travolta... oh wait... ha...

Then my question is: Why is it that we (read "gay men") get so excited that an actor might be gay? My only probable answer could be that if, say, Zefron, were gay, that would mean that one lucky guy would get to pound that sweet be with him. Allow me to be the first to squash your hopes :)

Different websites are giving me different information about this, higher and lower, so lets just say the average male-to-female ratio is 1:1. According to a few studies, approximately 1 of every 3 men is gay. Zefron lives in LA, which has a population of 3,792,621. Using our sweet math skills, lets assume that there are 632,103.5 gay men in LA, and let's face it, that half-a-man doesn't stand a chance. If you are one of those 632,103 men, then you have a 1 in 632,103 chance of winning the Zefron! If you are not, there's some bigger math! Of the 312,851,569 people in the US, our happy little math game tells us that about 52,141,928 of them are gay men. If you are a gay man, in the US, you have a 1 in 52,141,928 of sleeping with being with the Zefron.


So seriously... why are we so excited? Oh yea, because they're fun to look at :)


One of fifty-two-million, and hoping,
Ash